CBS Forgery Update
Topic: politics
The Washington Post demolishes the two experts who propped up CBS's Monday night defense of the forged documents - Marcel Matley:

The lead expert retained by CBS News to examine disputed memos from President Bush's former squadron commander in the National Guard said yesterday that he examined only the late officer's signature and made no attempt to authenticate the documents themselves.

"There's no way that I, as a document expert, can authenticate them," Marcel Matley said in a telephone interview from San Francisco. The main reason, he said, is that they are "copies" that are "far removed" from the originals.

and Bill Glennon:

In its broadcast last night, CBS News produced a new expert, Bill Glennon, an information technology consultant. He said that IBM electric typewriters in use in 1972 could produce superscripts and proportional spacing similar to those used in the disputed documents.

Any argument to the contrary is "an out-and-out lie," Glennon said in a telephone interview. But Glennon said he is not a document expert, could not vouch for the memos' authenticity and only examined them online because CBS did not give him copies when asked to visit the network's offices.

This is CBS' odd response:

Asked about Matley's comments, CBS spokeswoman Sandy Genelius said: "In the end, the gist is that it's inconclusive. People are coming down on both sides, which is to be expected when you're dealing with copies of documents."

What does this mean? Are they admitting that they don't even know if the things are real? Or are they saying, "Yeah, they're fakes, but go ahead and try to prove it"? Kausfiles notices some weasel-words in Rather's segment last night:

"What is in the '60 minutes' report CBS news believes to be true and believes to be authentic."

Of all the people to walk the plank for, Dan Rather picked John Kerry???

Marc

Addendum:
Trace CBS' expert witness Bill Glennon's rapid ascent from typewriter repairman to "technology consultant" to "document expert".

And another authentic memo surfaces.

Proof that nothing good has ever happened in California
Topic: schadenfreude
Todd Marinovich, former USC star and first round pick by the Raiders is serving a 90 day jail term for methamphetemine posession. Sad.

How do you go from being a first round draft pick in the NFL to a meth/heroin addicted skateboard beach bum in you mid thirties?

At least he wasn't a Steeler.

Draper

Rather Curious
Topic: politics
Well, if you haven't yet made up your mind about the CBS memo controversy:

This is the CBS memo in question, superimposed on the same memo recreated by Charles Johnson at Little Green Footballs using Microsoft Word (not a commonplace technology in 1973). There's all kinds of technical analysis of the memo, and the technology used to produce it here; credit is being given to Power Line for initially exposing CBS' fraud; there's a timeline of the whole thing at Slate.

Although most people are hailing this debacle as a victory for 'bloggers in pajamas' over the mainstream media, I am actually watching the CBS network news for the first time in years. Admittedly, I am tuning in mostly for the chance to see Dan Rather weep on-air.

Marc

What did we learn yesterday class?
Topic: gloating
With the first week of pro football action in the bag we've had a few surprises, some business as usual things, and yes, proof that sometimes Marc is wrong, and better yet, Draper is right.

First the principals:
Ravens 3 Browns 20
Redskins 16 Bucs 10
Steelers 24 Raiders 21

What do these scores tell us? Well, first, the Ravens and their Wonder bread lame ass QB need to run that Jamal Lewis guy 40 or 50 times more a game. Better yet, just direct snap it to him. Take Boller out and put another 400 lb. tub of guts up there to block for him. Already we can see the Boller is superfluous. As for the Redskins, and god this kills me to say, they looked solid. All around, solid, a playoff team, maybe. But it was the Bucs and they quit playing sometime last season. The Bucs are just a bunch of check cashers at this point. And then there is the Steelers. I remember one naysayer jerk in particular saying that they might go 0-4 to start the season. Oh no. For now we will gloss over the 300 and some yards that the ancient Rich Gannon threw against them. Time to bask in the reflected glory.

Reflected glory....ahhh.

Draper

Why Yes, I Am Ready For Some Football
Topic: sports
Just wanted to get these on the record before kickoff tonight:

Steelers: 6-10. Sorry Draper.
Redskins: 9-7, Wild Card. Check the weak schedule.
Ravens: 9-7, AFC North champs. EEED REEED!
Super Bowl: Chiefs over the Saints. The NFC sucks big-time, hence the Saints.

Marc

"Department Of Wellness": Will It Cover Botox?
Topic: politics
Courtesy of Kausfiles - who calls it "spirit-crushing foolishness" - Evita Teresa proposes Department of Wellness:

The other head-scratcher uttered by Kerry in the past two days came Wednesday in Greensboro, N.C. There, in response to a question from a woman about the health problems caused by mold and indoor air contamination--and her complaint, "There's not one agency in this government that has come forward" to deal with the problem--Kerry endorsed the creation of a new federal department. "What I want to do, what I'm determined to do, and it's in my health-care plan, is refocus America on something that can reduce the cost of health care significantly for all Americans, which is wellness and prevention," Kerry said. So far, so good. But then, "And I intend to have not just a Department of Health and Human Services, but a Department of Wellness." Again, what? Apparently this idea comes from Teresa Heinz Kerry, who told the Boston Herald in January 2003 that she would, in the Herald's words, "be an activist first lady, lobbying for a Department of Wellness that would stress preventive health."

Marc

Electoral Engineering
Topic: politics
Thanks to the only man I know who owns an Electoral College t-shirt - the one and only Joenado - for sending me a WSJ story on possible electoral nuttiness.

The focus is mainly on the Colorado initiative to split that state's electoral votes proportionally - an effort sponsored by Democratic backers hoping to pick up a few more electoral votes for Kerry. But a nationwide proportional system would still have resulted in a Bush presidency:

But if this system had been in effect nationwide in 2000, Mr. Gore would have edged out Mr. Bush, 269-263, with Ralph Nader picking up six electoral votes, all in large states. This would have thrown the election to the House, where Mr. Bush presumably would have won.

But even if the Colorado initiative doesn't pass, there is still an opportunity for the election to go to the House:

Shifts in electoral votes and the realities of an evenly divided nation mean there is a credible case that the final tally in Bush vs. Kerry could be 269-269 -- an outcome that would throw the election to the House of Representatives.

If all states repeat their 2000 outcomes, except for New Hampshire and West Virginia going Democratic, the result would be a 269-269 tie in the Electoral College. You think the Democrats were mad last time? Just imagine how they would react to a president elected by Congress!

But wait, there's more! The prospect of a rogue elector has reared its ugly head:

South Charleston Mayor Richie Robb said today he may vote against George W. Bush in the Electoral College, even if the president carries West Virginia's popular vote.

Robb, long known as a maverick Republican, said he is considering using his position as one of the state's five Republican electors to protest what he believes are misguided policies of the current administration.

Exciting stuff.

Marc

I Am Everywhere You Want To Be, Hank Hill
Topic: foolishness
This morning, the little lady and I were commuting southbound on 97, when the guy in the next lane rolled down his window to show us a small ID card.

He must have noticed the Badnarik for President bumper sticker - it was a Libertarian Party card.

Marc

Day One, Year Two
Topic: foolishness
I assume everyone has marked their calendar and appropriately celebrated the first anniversary of We Three Jerks. Take a look at what we were bloviating about this time last year.

Ah, the things we have accomplished in the past year - I got a full-time job, Tony is moving to a new place in Charles Village, and Draper had his head burned with lye.

I post while desperately trying to pay attention to the Republican convention. What a snoozefest - the Democrats at least have the appeal of a potential trainwreck. Michael Steele was pretty solid, though:

You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong. You cannot help the wage earner by pulling down the wage payer. You cannot further the brotherhood of man by encouraging class hatred. You cannot help the poor by destroying the rich. You cannot build character and courage by taking away man's initiative and incentive. And you cannot help men permanently by doing for them what they should do for themselves.

Marc

Reagan: Let's Stop Bitching About These Taxes
Topic: politics
I could just quote the headline and leave it at that:

McCain: Campaign needs to move beyond Vietnam

But I won't:

"I'm sick and tired of re-fighting the Vietnam War. And most importantly, I'm sick and tired of opening the wounds of the Vietnam War, which I've spent the last 30 years trying to heal," the Arizona Republican said at a lunch with USA TODAY and Gannett News Service. "It's offensive to me, and it's angering to me that we're doing this. It's time to move on."

Hey, he's right! What could be more tiresome than someone using his military experience as justification for a political career?

Marc

Swift Boat To Nowhere
Topic: politics
The new LA Times poll is out, which shows Bush ahead (by 3) for the first time in what has been a Kerry-leaning poll all year (Kerry was up by 9 not so long ago). It includes this incredible stat:

Asked how Kerry's overall military experience would affect their vote, 23% said it made them more likely to vote for him, while 21% said it made them less likely; the remaining 53% said it would make no difference.

That is, Kerry's Vietnam record is now a wash. Take away Vietnam and what's left? Mickey Kaus:

Unfortunately, it's more or less all Kerry's got. It wouldn't be so important if Kerry had a) a discernable ideology; b) a political message; c) a record of achievement; or d) an appealing personality!

Marc

Thank You Very Much, Mr. 19th Amendment
Topic: politics
Liz reports from a "Women For Kerry" rally at Lawyer's Mall in Annapolis:

Several thousand dollars worth of expensive sandals (my own Birks included)...one braless woman breastfeeding (not hippie braless--rich Annapolitan)...two dogs with various anti-Bush/pro-Kerry memorabilia on them...no members of the press...some very unfortunate outfits...four purses worth more than my car...one hippie folk-singer who was given the honor of opening AND closing the rally

Marc

Stick To Selling Soup
Topic: sports
Just getting myself warmed up for a season of Donovan McNabb bashing - from TMQ:

The Cincinnati offense was decent in 2003, but in the offseason Lewis decreed that Carson Palmer would replace Jon Kitna as quarterback. Kitna's been the butt of a lot of cheap jokes (certainly none by me!), yet in 2003 finished as the ninth-rated passer -- higher rated than Tom Brady and Donovan McNabb, to name a couple gentlemen who are pretty good.

What will be McNabb's excuse this year, now that he has Terrell Owens to throw to? And for that matter, what will be Terrell Owens' excuse, now that he doesn't have Jeff Garcia to kick around? Putting those two jerkoffs on the same team is enough to make me root for the Skins.

Marc

What I Did On My Summer Vacation
Topic: LEGO
The lone Jerk single-handedly battles the silence...

So how was Brickfest, you ask? Madness:

About 1500 people showed up for the public expo on Sunday, and while they were impressed with our LEGO nerd skillz, they had little to say for our personal hygiene:

Speaking of public day, the .space room was quite popular and without proper ventilation, prompting me to remark to Teddy "This place smells like a men's locker room." Overhearing me, a soccer mom had this to say. "This is nothing, you should go to the robot-room, I don't think those people bathe."

Going to Brickfest is always a nice reality check for me. Sometimes I think my preoccupation with LEGO is a little nutty, but at Brickfest you meet people who need trailers to bring all their creations, or who are having archive-sized tracked shelving installed in their homes to store their LEGO collection. And sometimes, you see things like this.

If you would like to learn more about Brickfest, you can check out my pictures here; read a Post article about the event; or watch a Danish news segment (it's story #7).

Marc

Today, I Am A Man
Topic: foolishness
I successfully tied my first half-windsor knot this morning:

Now I just need to work on my cravat-tying skills.

Marc